When most people picture retirement, they imagine travel, hobbies, and more time with loved ones. What’s less often considered is the financial responsibility many retirees unexpectedly take on for their families. Whether it’s helping an adult child through a job loss or stepping in to support grandchildren, these unplanned expenses can put stress on retirement income if they aren’t accounted for in advance.
When Family Needs Arise
Take Lisa’s story as an example:
Her adult daughter, a single mother, suddenly lost her job. Wanting to help, Lisa decided to cover her daughter’s mortgage until she was back on her feet. While generous, Lisa also worried, could she afford to do this without risking her own financial security? She didn’t want to spend her early retirement supporting her children only to later become a financial burden on them.
Lisa’s situation is far from rare:
- 62% of people age 50+ provide financial support to family members (Merrill Lynch, Family & Retirement: The Elephant in the Room).
- Many older adults struggle to set boundaries around their giving.
- Family emergencies like job losses, natural disasters, or raising grandchildren can create sudden, unexpected demands.
- Nearly 5.8 million children live in homes where a grandparent is the head of household (AARP, 2013).
Clearly, family obligations in retirement are more common than many expect.
Planning Ahead for Family Support
While no one can predict every situation, planning for the possibility of helping family members can make a big difference. Key questions to consider include:
- How much do you want (and feel able) to give?
- What form will that support take? Cash, covering certain expenses, or non-financial help?
- Who do you want to support, and under what circumstances?
Both spouses need to be part of these discussions. Framing the conversation around protecting your own long-term security, so you don’t become dependent on your children later, can help clarify healthy boundaries.
Being Ready for the Unexpected
Even with thoughtful planning, some situations can’t be anticipated. When those moments come, having a sustainable retirement income plan to fall back on provides clarity and confidence. A trusted financial advisor can:
- Offer an objective perspective during emotionally-charged family crises.
- Help weigh short-term generosity against long-term retirement security.
- Point you toward outside resources, such as community support programs.
For example, AARP has created communities for grandparents raising grandchildren to share experiences and find support. These often-overlooked resources can help ease the burden.